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A Facebook User

It's good to be able to feel open about yourself. I am sorry to hear about the boat sailing to having a good relationship with them. I admire you for the person that you are bare, nervous or otherwise. Hugs.


The minute you'd posted on Facebook about the parents, I had a feeling an admission like the one you made was coming...and, honestly, the response they had doesn't surprise me.

The biggest fear I had in coming out to my mother was losing my strong, loving relationship with her. Being rejected. Not being loved for who I am completely. My step-father having been killed the prior autumn, wasn't an issue - I know he would have been unsupportive if not downright violent about it. So I suppose his demise gave me an opening. And I took it.

And it went well. While I'm sure she would have liked grandkids, she has always been supportive of me. If anything, more so after coming out. She remains my rock. I'm not sure I'd be sitting here writing this now without her. Mind you, I don't share the kinky side with her - then again, she doesn't need to know - it doesn't impact her or my family the way yours could your family.

I honestly wish you had the same kind of experience in coming out (either time) that I had. I simply do not understand parents that, regardless of whatever qualms they might have, do not love and support their children regardless of their orientation. I get the whole "I'd like my son/daughter to follow my footsteps" or "lead a life like mine", but I would hope the larger concern would be "is my son/daughter happy, healthy, successful and loved?" and "am I being supportive of that?"

I suppose that's too much to ask of some people. I'm sorry to hear your parents seem to be in that category. They are your parents. Just because you're an adult doesn't mean you don't need or love them, regardless of their rejection.

I'm trusting that you've made your peace with this. I'm not sure I could, at least not that easily.

You are right - sometimes, it doesn't get better. But not everyone gets stronger.

Remember Hemingway - “The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.”

One thing I'm certain of in my own life is that being broken is not a bad thing. I've come out stronger every single time. There are days I'm not sure how. Honestly, I think it speaks to my own particular kinks and why they've come to the fore for me as of late.

One thing I'm certain of with you is that you are strong in those broken places. And in sharing what you have here and elsewhere, you help others achieve the same thing. Never doubt that. If you do, I'll be there to kick your skinny ass and remind you. ;)


It's too bad your parents never realized that you would have always ended up being the person you were destined to be, and not some manifestation of some visions, dreams, or hopes they had of their offspring on the day they found out they were pregnant with you. Life never works out the way you want it; you would think religious people would realize that more than anyone else sometimes.

What you did took balls, man. Good for you. You made the decision to follow what you believe in and are passionate about. All I want to say is that if they don't come around, they are missing out on the opportunity to know a truly remarkable, open and honest, effective, and articulate teacher. It's your life to live and your decisions to make, no one else can live your life for you and neither should you be expected to live up to their expectations. How things play out may also surprise you.


I can honestly say...I'm one of the few men in the world who has leaned on you...who has laughed and loved with you. It is rare that you actually make me cry however. Reading this tonight...the brutal honestly in which you conveyed exactly what happened is difficult...but part of the reason you are such a leader. And we discussed this happening. But, you did it anyway so that you could lead a honest and open life. Who you are and what you have to teach is important to the world as we move forward. You are courageous and inspirational and tonight...even in pain...You showed someone out there that living honesty is better then living closeted.
It is no hidden fact that my family has done the same thing as yours. But I have tied my life to yours...in our business, our friendship, and now our family. I will hug you this weekend as you, the pup, and I...start this adventure together. Brothers and Family.
The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life.
Rarely do members of one family grow up under the same roof. -Richard Bach

love, life, and leather


I know the feeling of wishing that things were different.

I wish that I could share my Mum with you, like I have with my friends. While she may not understand her kinkster son, she loves me and cares for me more than anyone in the world. In fact, she loves all of her boys, some who she's related to, but most of whom she's not.

Watching her has made me realise how lucky I am, and how, although we can't choose our family, we can choose our Family.

So, if you're ever Down Under, you'll have a seat at my table, and my Family's.

- DAemon


What you did was courageous and inspiring, not only for coming out in emotionally loaded circumstances, but for standing up for who you are. History has proven again and again that what is acceptable and tolerated in a society changes only when people stand up for themselves and be proud regardless of the consequences.


This must have been an extremely difficult thing to do. Kudos, though, for doing it.

Hope you are well.

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