The Bondage

I've been asked by a couple readers who think they don't necessarily understand my fetish to further explain.  What exactly is it that makes me tick, and what is it about boys into bondage?  It's a complicated question.

I've always said and will continue to say that my main fetish is bondage.  Anything beyond that may turn me on, sure, but this is where it all started for me.  I know I'm not alone either - but as I've grown older,
 I've learned/discovered that the TRUE bondage enthusiasts among us are fewer and farther between than I originally thought.  When I was exploring the kinky sites and learning more, I thought EVERYONE was into bondage....and that may be the case, a little, but the "specialists" are less frequent.

I think on a certain level, either you get it or you don't.  The best way to illustrate this is to start from the beginning.  I first remember being turned on by the idea of bondage when I was 4 years old.  Yes, four.  I know you're all going to squirm as you read this, and I'm squirming pretty hard as I'm typing it myself, but I can't deny it.  I remember sitting in the back of my parent's station wagon on a family vacation.  I was doing a coloring book to pass the time.  I flipped though it, and the last page was a picture of three cowboys, all tied back with their backs to a pole, all of them gagged with these huge bandannas covering their mouths.  Even at that age, I was inexplicably drawn to that picture; I remember being turned on by it.  Even at 4 years old.

I think most of the people who are into bondage understand this.  But what is it specifically that turns me on about it?  It's a culmination of a lot of factors.  It's the feeling of the rope.  It's straining against said rope and stretching your body out.  It's the feeling of helplessness, knowing that you can't stop what's happening to you.  Add a gag, blindfold, and ear plugs, and it's sensory deprivation to the max.  That's why a lot of times, bondage enthusiasts like mummification so much.  But what's so sexy about that?

Think about it this way.  You can't speak.  You can't see.  You can't hear what's going on very well, you can't move at all, and you definitely can't get out of the bondage by yourself.  The only thing you CAN feel is your dick.  Think about all the other sensory inputs in your body being shut off, and the only thing you can feel and focus your mind on is that incredible sexual arousal.  I never really thought of it this specifically before, but it's definitely a mind trip. 

But honestly, I can't say I have much of an appeal to professional bondage(sites like www.boundgods.com, www.boundinpublic.com, etc.) and/or professional porn.  The realism is very important to me, and it's far too obvious that the guys in those sites and others like it really only enjoy the bondage as an adjunct to the sex.  Sure, they may look pretty, and they're looking to get fucked by a pretty guy, but they're not *really* into it.  It's painfully obvious to me that the guys in the porn wouldn't be having sex with bondage if they weren't being paid to.  To me, a guy who really gets into bondage gets hard when he's tied up, regardless of whether or not he's getting fucked.  That realism is very important to me; and honestly?  Unless a guy understands that, my motivation to play with him decreases significantly.  I mean, I love to see a hot, muscled, sexy guy bound in rope as much as the next guy; but unless you can convince me that it's at least a *little* bit real, I'm not that interested.

That's why I/we love kidnapping scenes.  That's why the thought of being grabbed off the street is so hot to me.  It makes the bondage REAL.  Even if it is just role-play, it becomes real.  That's the other reason that porn doesn't appeal to me; the odds that I will ever get to screw around with a chiseled man like on those sites is pretty slim to none.  I can't see myself ever being in those scenes.  But if I see an amateur video of a guy being tied up and toyed with...well...that's something I can imagine being a part of quite easily.

Couple this with the fact that the men are never gagged in profesional porn, and I just get bored.  (I wish Bound and Gagged would come back online; they always gagged their models!) Among my friends who are part of this fetish, gags seem to be a very common focal point.  This is, in my opinion, the root of why the bondage enthusiasts are not very proud of their fetish.  For me, just the feeling of the pressure of tape or a hand or a bandanna pressed against my mouth is enough to make me hard, regardless of whether or not I'm tied up.  I can't describe why; I've just always been that way.  I think that's a common theme among those of us into bondage, and I think we're all ashamed to admit it too.  It's the stupidest, most random part of the body to be an erogenous zone; and we know it.

And there you have it.  The bondage.  It doesn't matter how stupid anyone thinks my fetish that doesn't make any sense is.  Yes, I know that a white van and a ski mask isn't quite the sexiest thing in the world to a lot of people, but honestly?  I can't think of a better way to spend an afternoon than tied up and toyed with by a dom that knows his work. Bonus points if I didn't see it coming first.  

Usually when I tell someone that I get into bondage, their immediate response is, "Yeah, I'd love to tie you up and fuck you!"  They view the bondage as an adjunct to some otherwise very hot sex.  Not that sex is bad.  I certainly keep myself induldged.  But this is where a lot of my friends have struggled to  understand where I'm coming from. Some of them don't understand how you can get off in that position or else how you're supposed to get fucked while you're hanging from the ceiling or wrapped up from head to toe in duct tape.

These concerns are valid, and for the most part, I do believe there are two kinds of bondage kinksters.  Those like me, who've known this was a big part of them their whole lives.  There are also those who get into it later on and kinda get used to the idea, and it works for them.  And that's great!  The more the merrier.  I think most people that get into bondage later tend to be more interested in the bondage as an adjunct to sex.  Not that this is bad; by all means, people should absolutely be tying each other up and fucking.  But as I said at the beginning, I've realized how few of the born-enthusiasts there are.

I don't need to jizz to enjoy myself (although, it never hurts).  We're talking about two different kinds of sex.  The thing you can't forget is that the sex starts with the first knot, and ends when I can move again.

Comments

[Alpha Alpine]

Excellent and compelling statements about bondage Tynan and what it means to be a true enthusiasts.

[Account Deleted]

That last picture.... Is that an homage to Y: THE LAST MAN?

[kinkyboinick]

Love it, you describe it so well, I mean, I love the whole tactile/touching when bound...knowing that you are stuck and someone can have their way with you, and all you can do is struggle with your bonds...with a hard cock.

[TiedFeetGuy]

Love this post. Gags are pretty indispensable for me, too. And when playing with others, it doesn't have to be about the dick... Just the act of bondage in and of itself is more than enough. I save the dick for the BF. ;)

[Boybondage]

Thanks for sharing this, I feel the same way!

I too started young - not as young as you - but much younger than most people would be comfortable with.

And I think the fact that there is definite stirring down there while reading your post (and it's not just because of the hot pics of you bound up), says a lot.

[rubberbondageTO]

I know how you feel. I started off with my bondage experience when I was in Grade 4, so slightly older than you. First duct tape on mouth, then pretend to be tied up, then started experimenting it when I was in college with handcuffs. Then met a great mentor with a strict heavy bondage weekend and it has been a great bondage journey for the past 10 years. I agreed that it's very difficult to find someone who is strictly bondage first. I think I have only met 3-4 people that are truely bondage enthusiasts and who gets off on just bondage. For me, a great hogtie or a rope harness around my inner thighs get me going. Thanks for the great blog. Keep it up your great work.

[bootboi10]

Bondage is a wonderful thing - it takes all the choices away from a slave (like me). There should be no other way. Bondge helps a slave expand his limits. Master wanted me to post this - he says that all should know what is really good for a slave and slave agees with Master. Thank You Sir

[Thigvt Bondage]

Well wrote about Bondage: "specialists" are less frequent! Sorry to write but I'm quite expert in Bondage Specialists. Bondage is wired to dick! Boys who has been tiedup tight by me had always huge hard on! Some of boys has even get cumming when tiedup and gagged in extreme way before rope did even get to dick! Some of sessions have also been record into video but like it is always - have not time to hangup enough at internet to upload there some. Nice blog with lot of thoughts! Thanks!

[southern california escorts]

I am so intrigued by all of this bondage stuff, I haven't tried it yet but it looks like the ultimated in submission.

Excellent photos!