I believe that I'm going to be trying to spend a lot more time on Fetlife in the near future. For one reason, I realize how important the hetero community is to kinksters. There are a LOT of them on Fetlife, and I feel like I haven't really extended enough of a hand to the hetero community of players - and I really am interested in what makes them tick.
The other reason is that I'm continually disappointed by Facebook.
Last night I decided to try some of those little ads on Facebook to promote this site/blog. I figure if I really want to start doing more workshops, presentations, discussions, etc. that it's not just going to be handed to me. So I fill out all the info for my ad, preview it, specify that it should only be visible to people who are 18 or over and who say in their profiles that they "like" bondage, bdsm, kink, flogging, etc. etc. etc. I wouldn't really want to expose completely vanilla people to my ad and/or my website. After I had all the possible keywords put in for potential viewers, it said the ad would have a reach of around 400,000 people. That's definitely more than just a little bit.
So I finish things up and submit my ad for review by Facebook. I was hopeful that given all these barriers coupled with the fact that this site really isn't pornographic (although it is for an adult audience), it would be approved. Much to my disappointment, it was not. Included in the rejection e-mail was a specific reason:
"The content promoted in this ad is not permitted on Facebook. We reserve the right to choose the advertisements that appear on the site, and ads for this product or service should not be resubmitted. Please visit our Help Center for more specific information."
So I go in and look at the help center and from what I can tell, it shows that they do not allow content of "adult" themes. Specifically, "Facebook does not allow advertisements that contain or promote adult content. This may include nudity, adult dating sites, adult toys or products, or images of people in positions or activities that are excessively suggestive or sexual. Some sexual health products or services may be allowed, including ads for contraceptives or sexual health resources, but such ads must be targeted to users over the age of 18. Sexual performance enhancers are not permitted."
Let's not forget that the whole point of this website is to be a "resource". And yet, it's completely allowed in their terms of service for alcohol providers (think: Budwiser, etc.) to promote themselves on Facebook. Last time I checked, alcohol was an adult product intended for an adult audience. What kind of sense does this make? And if the ad would only be viewable to people who are over the age of 18 who clearly state sexually-suggestive material on their own profiles, how is this really harming anyone, or facebook for that matter? Isn't it worse for their to be alcoholic advertisements on people who are recovering alcoholics or prefer not to drink?
My ad was not rejected because it was "adult" in nature. It was rejected because Facebook is kinkophobic.
I would fight it if I had the energy. In the meantime, however, I'll just be going back to a social networking site that is made by us, for us, and doesn't discriminate against us. I hate that no matter how much progress we make, we're always taking a step backward.
This is the face of kinkphobia.