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Bob Wingate

One of the best bondage scenes I ever had—one of the best bondage WEEKENDS I've ever had—was in the middle of nowhere. Not Minneapolis, where I've never been, but upstate New York, somewhere outside of Rochester. I never did find out exactly where, since two miles out of the airport the Montana cowboy who was now living there and had picked me up, tied me up, gagged and blindfolded me, so I never really did find out exactly where he lived. I wasn't so foolish as to let this happen to me with a total stranger. I'd already met the guy and we'd done some bondage together, at the New York Bondage Club. But he wanted me to visit him, so I did, and had an incredible weekend, not only with him but with two bondage buddies of his. You're right, Tynan, living in one of the biggest gay cities in the world doesn't mean you're always going to get tied up by the best and brightest. From my experience, I'll take my chances with the middle of nowhere anytime.


I've always liked Minneapolis. In fact, it's on the list of ten or so places that I shall prioritize looking for a new job when it's time. I'd move there over NYC or anywhere in California any day. You're right, of course, in that you have to make the most of anywhere you live.

Dave Rolsky

According to Wikipedia, Minneapolis is the 47th largest city in the country.

Tynan Fox

Oh, damn, you caught me. I was confusing the statistic with that of the largest Metropolitan Area, and even then, I'm still wrong. It's #13. Good catch, sorry for the errata.


Great blog, Tynan! You're an expressive writer and able to get what you want to say out in a way that is easy to understand. And you got great props from Dan Savage this week! I agree with you...the middle of the continent seems to generate these ideas of 'quality over quantity' in the kink/fetish world since all the kinky boys seem to be spread out therefore each opportunity to get into a scene seems so much more valuable and precious. I'm originally from Western Canada, so I have seen what you're talking about.

Tynan Fox

Reid, Thank you for the compliments!  And thats precisely what this blog is for, Im trying to bring a voice to a those of us who all feel this way.  :)  You should drop a link to this site on your blog, Ill add yours to my own Links page! :)


"...there is essentially NOTHING to the West until you get to the coast..."

Not that I live there (in fact, I'm in Mpls, too), but I've been to Denver and it's pretty big (and has a thriving BDSM culture).

I just found your blog. *Love it.*

Tynan Fox

Thanks for the compliment.  :)  And yes, I have heard that Denver has a great BDSM community, but when I was thinking West, I was thinking DUE west, where the closest major city is........Seattle.  :(


Great blog,
I agree w/ basically everything you say here. However I am running into more and more people from Chi area thinking a drive of more then 1 hour is far too long and not willing to go.

I do get sick of always having to drive somewhere, but I do really enjoy every session I have driven for & I get to meet some great people who also live away from the big cities.

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